I can't watch pbs sober anymore
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
this will be a night to untag.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize