i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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