Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
