It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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