no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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