He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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