im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I checked into jail on foursquare
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
