Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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