My brain says no but my pants say off.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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