There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
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