i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize