I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
