she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
