I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
