Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
