Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
