Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
