Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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