just come out here and I will go home with you...
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize