its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
