And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
