the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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