let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
