At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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