I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
two words...techno handjob
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
