Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
