I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
