I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
