ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
