Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
