Say something about gay babies.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize