I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
