Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
