the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
