i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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