come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
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