Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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