How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
