I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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