Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
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