Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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