Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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