question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
