Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I will be naked everywhere
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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