Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
