Your favorite bartender is back from prision
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
