Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
