At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
