OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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