just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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