So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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